Heaven is Our Home

Ever have one of those days, week, months when you feel like you are under attack? Well, that is how we have been feeling lately. I am normally not hugely into spiritual warfare and the such, but it has become quite evident that the devil is trying to mess with us – big time!

This past month we have had to go to the emergency room twice. The 1^st time was when Kamden got a fishing hook through his cheek. He was carrying my one year old nephew to the car to put him in his car seat, when he bumped into a fallen fishing pole it came back to hook him right in the cheek. I almost passed out trying to cut the line……comical now, but not at the time! The miracle was, other than not being hooked in the eye J, was that Braylin didn't get hurt. If that had happened to the baby he would have yanked the hook out and caused a lot of damage to his face. The doctors were able to remove it, and there is hardly a scar on Kamden's face. The doctor asked if he could take a picture – think hook, lead weight, feather thingy, all dangling from his face. He was quite popular in the waiting room and was very brave. He even got to keep the hook as a souvenir. Whew! What a day that was!

The next trip was today. What began as a quick stroll around the neighborhood (I had 15 min. before Anthony & I had to leave for an appt with the prosthetic doctor) turned out to be a nightmare. I was going to take Loegan in the stroller and have Schuyler come along too, but at the last moment they decided not to come because we weren't going to have time to stop at the playground. I had my Bluetooth, and was intending to finish up some phone calls that I needed to make on my power walk *smile*. This was around 2:00. I only got a few houses down when I saw a neighbor on the opposite side of the street open his front door. Then I saw 2 angry looking dogs bound out the door and head straight for me. I was utterly overwhelmed at that moment and managed to utter "It's ok puppies" in a sweet voice as they stared at me with bared teeth. For some reason, which I am curious to know, they were just really ticked off. A split second later one bit, and then the other - over and over :( I tried to kick, but couldn't because either one or the other was always latched on. I kept looking straight at them - I think I would have turned around, but I knew my kids were back playing in my yard. They had me cornered anyway. I resisted screaming until I couldn't handle the pain. Boy, that hurt!!! A large golden retriever had also followed the 2 "demons" out of the house and was standing there growling and snarling. The noise of it all, coupled with my screams was overwhelming. I was so stunned that I didn't know if he was growling at me or the other 2 dogs. I was so scared of his teeth that I cried out "Help me Jesus!" I kept my arms up and put my hands in front of my face. My dad, who was working in the yard, finally heard me. He thought it was just a dog fight he was hearing, but when he realized it was my voice, he came. The dog's owner seemed to be in shock and it seemed like forever until he reached us. The dogs wanted to eat me I think because they just didn't quit! The owner had to kick the dogs off of me because they didn't respond to any verbal commands. I am really surprised he didn't get bit too. He said "They didn't break through the skin did they?" I told him that judging from the pain I had/was experiencing I thought so. I gingerly lifted up my jeans and showed him the blood. Then after locking the dogs back up he walked down to where my Dad & I were. He said he was really sorry, but I wasn't in the mood to chat. I apologized for having a minor panic attack because of "everything" that was going on in my life. It's hard to be Christ-like when you are scared and in pain, but I tried! Then we were off to the ER.

Anthony had to be at his appt.to check the fake upper palate for his mouth(Ewww, poor A!) He would have come if I had insisted, but his appointment was too important to miss. My mom came with me, and the boys stayed cooped up in my Dad's truck until Anthony was done. The wounds, which hurt while they were happening, didn't stop hurting. My lower legs BURNED and ThRoBbEd(like my word picture?;) They gave me ice packs and elevated my legs which helped a lot. They gave me the form to have animal control sent over to my neighbor's house. When I finally was seen the puncture wounds had to be boiled out – and if that sounds bad – IT WAS. I don't believe they don't give you a little "something" before that happens- this coming from a girl who refused any pain meds. during childbirth.

6:00 pm and 1 strong anti-biotic prescription later I was home eating a bowl of chicken soup on the couch, trying to calm my nerves. I am exhausted. Please pray that this situation will be resolved, that the dogs will be up -to-date on their rabies shots and that they will be put down in a timely manner, because I believe they are a threat to others.

I am struck by God's greatness and His protection. Things could have been a lot worse, had I brought the kids with me or had I been wearing my usual jogging shorts, instead of my thicker jeans - ouch! I know that I had angels watching over me. I would really like a quieter day tomorrow though! ;)

Just a couple days before Anthony's cancer diagnosis, Loegan came to me and asked me, "Mommy, can you teach me a new song?" I thought for a second, and then the song, The Wise Man Built His House Upon The Rock, popped into my head. Loegan and I sang it - complete with hand motions (I was a little rusty .J) I hadn't sang that for years, and I had no idea how symbolic that little tune would become!

Back in the beginning of August, God really impressed upon Anthony's heart to become more of a spiritual leader in our household. Don't get me wrong, Jesus has always been central in our family life, but Anthony's heart was being stirred to go even deeper, to disciple his children on a daily basis and to spend more exclusive time together in the Word. From that time on, each member of our family has individual personal Bible and prayer time each and every day (I read a devotion to Loegan), and we also have a Bible study daily as a family. There have been some days that this fits nicely into our schedule, and other times when we have had to "make" time, even if that meant waiting up for Daddy to come home from work @ 11pm! On a number of occasions when children have been sick or tired and cranky, when I had a migraine or desperately needed to get some things done around the house or when Anthony was beyond exhausted after working a 12 hr. shift, we were tempted to skip it just for that day. We had to come to a point that skipping Bible time is not an option. I am not sharing this to say that we have our lives in perfect order, by any means! We still have a LONG way to go in submitting our lives to Him and aligning our lives and hearts to His will. Rather, this is a testimony to God' s greatness because HE prepared us all spiritually before this trial. We were obedient, but it was our loving Father who guided us to firm up our family's foundation so it would be strong enough to withstand this storm. Fathers, committing to grow your family spiritually is a hard task, but God will bless you for it! I am aware that it can be tough (or sometimes nearly impossible) to get the whole family together in one place, but the time you have to carve out of your schedule to spend in the Word NEVER returns void.

We had no inkling that this "Bible" time would become so precious to us. I am crying tears of joy, and of heartache right now because we don't know exactly know how we will manage spending time with God as a family during Anthony's hospitalization. We have no idea how this will work, but we will probably have to get quite creative! The doctors have told us that Anthony will have great difficulty speaking after his surgery – and from that time on. :( This saddens my heart, but I am convinced that God will take all these struggles and use them. We want God to be glorified through our weaknesses – sometimes that is when God can use us best! I challenge you to prayerfully consider shepherding your own little flock too – while you still have breath and while you have a voice! We wish we had made this commitment sooner, but we are grateful to have had this sweet time – you never know when your time here on earth will run out, so be effective and seize the day

⁶ And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. ⁷ Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. ⁸ Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. ⁹ Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.

Deuteronomy 6:6-10  

Little providences, not coincidences we have seen along the way:
I am amazed when I think of how Anthony even happened to have the painless, small, un-ulcerated tumor looked at in the 1^st place.

~ My sister (who I hadn't seen in almost a year) flew to SC for a visit just 2 days before Anthony's diagnosis. She was available to watch the boys during that 1^st visit to the oral surgeon, and has been able to help during the whirlwind of chaos that followed in the days thereafter.J

~ My brother, Drue, coming over to be with us the day Anthony got the really bad news. Anthony had to still go in to work that day/night and I was beside myself………Drue bought pizza for the boys and I and played Catch Phrase to help get our minds off things.

~ Our Pastor being available to pray with us after receiving daunting news at the oral surgeon's office.

~ Anthony's diagnosis just happened to come at the exact time of year when we sign up for a new Insurance plan. Needless to say, we didn't go with the HOA (no prescription drug coverage) plan that we usually get. We had already met our LARGE deductible this year, thanks to Yours Truly, so we are at 80/20 until the end of Dec. and surgery is supposed to happen a month before then.

~ We are thankful for a powerful prayer time at the altar of our church. That time of prayer helped immensely to calm our fears and greatly decrease my anxiety level.

~ My parents quickly volunteered to relocate for a time to come out to help with everything. They have just bought a camper to park at our house. I am grateful for their willingness to help with transportation, caring for our home and even homeschooling the boys, if necessary. I could never express in words what their support means to the boys, Anthony & I.

~ My just turned 15 yr. old brother, Dyllon and 17 yr. old brother, Saunders – who did not complain when they were told that they would have to leave friends/activities in NH for a while. I understand that it is is hard for a teenager to leave his "life" and appreciate their readiness to pack up and come down here!

~ Favor with HOA. Board members have been extremely gracious! They quickly approved allowing my parents camper to be parked along side of our house (thank you neighbors – especially ones across the street trying to sell their house! They also approved the removal of a large Sugar Gum tree that would allow for more space for the camper.

~ Guys from our church are coming over today to take down that Sugar Gum tree – what a blessing to know that it will be down just in time for my parents arrival tomorrow!

~ The doctor we were led to in Charlotte, Dr. Villeret, we like and feel comfortable with. We are relieved Anthony will be to be able to have surgery take place 2 hrs. from home and not more.

~ I received a settlement for a car accident 3 yrs. ago, when we 1^st moved to SC. This $ will allow me to have continued chiropractic car when I need it. My neck, back and right shoulder/arm are a mess because I have been in 9 car accidents.

~ On that same note, when I threw my back out last week, a dear friend (and very patient son) drove me to an appt. with a massage therapist. The massage really helped ease the pain (so it was at least tolerable) and the massage therapist just happened to be a homeschooling mom, whom I didn't know, but whose name I recognized from our home school support group e-mail loop! When my friend arrived to pick me back up, she had Chic-Fil-A waiting for me! She and her family also gave us a gift card from there and an adorable cow calendar. That really made my families and my day!

~ Favor with Anthony's workplace. His Personal Manager even went out of his way to come by our house with all the medical leave of absence paperwork – while a nasty stomach bug was hitting our boys hard.

~ A close friend, who has a cousin who is an oral surgeon, put us in contact with him. I was able to discuss details with him about Anthony's situation over the phone. He gave me reassurance and told me he would be praying for our family. After Anthony's appt. with the Ears, Nose, Throat Doctor (Villeret) Anthony was able to call his cell and run through things with him……….kind of like a 2cd opinion on the direction we were moving.

~ The boys co-op semester ended Nov. 11^th and doesn't start back up for the 2cd session until the 1^st week of Jan. This will ensure that they can still be a part of our co-op. Plus, it is close by to where my parents can easily drop/pick them off, if need be. It is a blessing to have the flexibility that comes with homeschooling J

~ I was able to schedule an appt. very quickly to have our family portraits done (busy season, as you know.) They had the exact day/time slot open that I had requested and our photographer was great.

~ This next one is SO girly – sorry! I just want to remember and record everything that the Lord has provided. The picture appt. that I had scheduled was happened within 2 days of my call and the night before I STILL did not have anything to wear (ok, ok, I had things I could have worn, but nothing that matched!) Anthony and the boys had matching vests that I had purchased ridiculously on sale last winter, but I wanted a dress to match. I looked online and Anthony agreed to chauffer me around on my search. We went to the store where I had seen the dress I liked online and they were sold out. Before leaving, I took a look on the clearance rack of this store I had never been to, and I found some great deals! I had been also looking for some tops and found some incredible deals $3-7 dollars a piece. When I was leaving, I expressed my disappointment that the dress I wanted was not available, because I had to find something for the next day. They offered to call their other location, which I didn't even know existed, to check and see if they had it. They did, and they put it on hold for me. I also found 2 more shirts………

~ A sweet couple, from our church called us Tuesday night to ask us if we would be able to go get away to the beach Fri. – Fri. Amazingly we had nothing scheduled, and said yes! At this news I was SHOCKED to say the least!!!!! I had been praying a silent prayer that our family would somehow be able to spend some precious time together, alone and away from all this mess, along with all the stress that it had brought with it. I, along with Anthony, started to feel ourselves burning out and felt the need to escape. I had no inkling that my prayer would ever be answered in such an extravagant way! As I type this, I am sitting in an adorable living room, in an adorable condo like living space, at a beautiful Hilton Head resort……………God is SO good and the verse that keeps entering my mind is that God is able to do more than we could ever ask or imagine! We are devoting this time to growing closer as a family, as we grow closer to God. Again, no words can express the extent of our gratefulness to this couple, in our church family, for this outpouring of love expressed toward our family! We pray God will richly bless them for blessing us!

~ I will close with another gift from God that our family was immensely touched to receive………A friend of mine called Wed. to ask if she could drop off something to us. When she arrived, I opened the gift bag she handed me and inside found a small treasure box. I called the boys over and proceeded to open the box where there was a scroll placed inside. As we unrolled the scroll I read what still brings tears to my eyes! (See pictures below.) It was an invitation to attend a show Fri. morning at Medieval Times. Below the scroll were gold coins, and enough cash to cover the cost mixed with beautiful seashells (I thought it was very symbolic because at the time she put the box together she had no idea we were going to the beach!) It was an educational show to boot - can you say field trip! ;) To go to Medieval Times had been a wish for us, even before kids, while we were still in college! The boys were BEYOND excited, and we found that we were easily able to drive the 2 hrs. to Atlanta to see the show before heading back over to Hilton Head for our beach vacation. They also let us borrow a beach umbrella, beach chairs and gave us a gift bag filled with Anthony's favorite snacks to enjoy before he can't. This gift of giving we have seen working through this family is something that we want to be a way of life for our family too.

We feel so unworthy of all the kindness that this family has showered upon our family. Again, no words are BIG enough to express our gratitude! One more interesting note - we do happen to have a common bond of seeing a family member suffer and cope with a devastating oral medical issue. This is just another thing that binds us together………Thank you God for the friends YOU have put in our path!

~ Anthony's lymph node biopsy came back negative! He will still have to go through radiation to his neck, in addition to his mouth, because of the high false negative result with the test. We were just told that more than likely he will have a feeding tube put into his side because the radiation to the neck area affects ones ability to swallow. We can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens us!

*Prayer needs*

* My parents, who are traveling from NH today, and arriving tomorrow. Pray for safety on the road, and renewed strength for my Dad and Mom – they have been sick with flu's and sinus inf. etc….

* Pray for Anthony's Medical Leave of Absence to go through and be processed in time. It has been a pain, to say the least, getting the doctor's office to cooperate and just get it done! They definitely were not feeling the sense urgency we were/are with having this completed. We began this process back a week and a half ago and I had hoped it would be resolved before vacation, but that didn't happen.

* Anthony's tumor, which we had not previously seen growth in since it was discovered, did noticeably increase in size over the past week. PLEASE urgently pray that more growth would be totally be inhibited!!!!

Thank you all for your prayers. God's hand and fingerprints have been ALL over this situation, as you have read. He really does become clearer during times of testing. We are praying God will use this trial to give testimony to the greatness of HIM!